Chapter 12: Striving to Be Better Than Him

The reunion didn't happen as quickly as Clara had anticipated. After returning to the country, Julian didn't even show his face at gatherings of old friends. It made sense; his life was now entirely different. Why would he turn back to rekindle an old flame with her? Clara gave a self-deprecating smile and took the cleaning cloth Jude handed to her.

On the weekend, the two finally managed to wake up early, intending to give the apartment a deep cleaning. Ever since the news of Julian’s return broke, Jude noticed that Clara stared at him while lost in thought more frequently. He had no way to investigate and no standing to question her, so he chose to be a silent companion. Whether he was a fake or a mere substitute didn't matter; at least he was the one by Clara’s side now. And he was determined to do better than Julian ever could.

"Jude, help me put this on the top shelf of the bookcase. I can't reach it."

"What is this?"

"Some old yearbooks, photos, things like that."

"May I see them?" Jude helped Clara down from the ladder. "You can take a break at the same time."

"Go ahead. I wasn't too bad-looking when I was younger; nothing to be ashamed of."

"You are very beautiful now as well."

"I think I need to adjust you to 'Child Mode' later," Clara feigned a look of disgust. "You're starting to get 'oily' with these lines."

"What does 'oily' mean?"

"It means I'm praising you for being handsome."

"Why do I feel like you are lying to me?"

"But you have no evidence."

"Oh..."

Clara brewed a cup of flower tea for herself and sat down with Jude on the beanbag chairs in the sunroom. The robot’s body was very cold; even if heat was transferred to him, it would dissipate in a very short time. Clara recalled the report Seraphina had sent her regarding the artificial constant-temperature system, calculating how to conduct verification tests on Jude. Halfway through her thoughts, Jude nudged her and asked,

"Is this a race?"

"Hmm? That was a sports meet. The school organized them every spring and autumn. I had no athletic talent, so I mostly just hung out with the cheerleading squad."

"Is running difficult?"

"For me, it's harder than reaching the heavens," Clara said with mock tragedy. "By the way, Jude, Sera showed me some research on artificial temperature systems recently. I plan to try it on you next month. It might not succeed, but at least it could keep you from being like a refrigerator, chilling the air twenty-four-seven, haha."

Hearing this, Jude’s eyes lit up. His hands brushed back and forth over the photo album. After a long moment, he replied, "Really? Clarie, thank you. I am so happy."

Clara took a sip of tea and reached out to pat his shoulder.

In the afternoon, they went out for their routine stroll, and Clara rarely decided to browse the mall. Because she had to wear a lab coat for work, she seldom bought clothes for herself, usually just picking up a few sets during seasonal changes, mostly through online shopping. Having some free time today, she bought a few outfits for both herself and Jude. The sales clerk was sweet-talked, and seeing them walking together, she complimented them on how well-matched they were. Clara froze for a moment but didn't explain. Jude, on the other hand, scrambled to take all the bags as they left, freeing up one hand to hold hers. Clara’s expression turned stiff, and she lowered her voice,

"What are you doing, bro?"

"Brothers can't hold hands?" Jude countered. "This is also a type of human behavior mimicry and learning, Dr. Evans."

"Instead of learning good things, you learn this," Clara attempted to shake him off, but his grip tightened. "If I run into an acquaintance, I'll never be able to find a real boyfriend!"

"Just for a moment. I'll let go once we're out the door. The clerk just gave us a fifty percent discount because she said we look good together. For the sake of the discount, let's just put on a show for her, okay, Clarie?"

The familiar nickname fell into her ears, and Clara’s attitude softened, allowing Jude to lead her out of the mall.

Fortunately, they didn't run into any acquaintances along the way. The smile on Jude's face didn't fade even after they got home; he even pushed his luck by lingering in Clara’s bedroom. Robots don't need sleep, but Clara had defaulted to giving Jude one of the guest rooms as his bedroom. He had never entered her room at night before, and they had coexisted peacefully until now. Clara didn't know what had gotten into him. Leaving aside the fact that he had a male appearance and the boundaries between men and women, or the fact that he looked like Julian, Clara really didn't want a giant block of ice sleeping next to her, dropping the temperature of the bed she had worked so hard to warm up. Jude sat by the edge of the bed, his voice sounding hurt,

"I don't mean that I want to get into the bed. I just want to stay here."

"The way you say that makes me sound like some deadbeat who's abandoning his family. You don't even sleep, why do you insist on staying in my bedroom? Are you going to record embarrassing photos of me sleeping and blackmail me?"

"No," Jude shook his head. "I just want to stay by your side."

"......I'm not a child; I don't need a 'Nighttime Companion System' activated. Jude, don't you know that in human society, an unmarried man and woman aren't supposed to share a room?"

"Really? I didn't know that." Jude blinked.

"Do you think I'll believe that?"

"Clarie," Jude leaned in close, resting his chin on her shoulder without reaching out to embrace her. "I know my body is cold, and I won't get on the bed. I just want to be with you. The nights are too long, Clarie. Being alone in the guest room... it's very lonely."

His soft hair brushed against her neck, sending a shiver down to her fingertips. Clara could hear her heart drumming like a frantic beat. Jude's request had no logical basis, yet she found no reason to refuse. Do robots feel lonely too? Clara felt as if a small puppy was curled up in her arms, obediently waiting in a vast house for its owner to finish work, staring at the TV alone.

It was just like the days she spent alone right after she and Julian had broken up—lonely.

"Fine," Clara finally softened. "Go to the bay window. If I wake up in the middle of the night and see someone sitting right next to me, I might die of fright. And don't wake me up; if you do, I'll send you back to the factory to be scrapped."

"Understood, Clarie."

Jude smiled and, seemingly by accident, brushed the tip of his nose against Clara’s chin as he moved away.

Clara didn't think much of it, assuming it was a careless touch. After freezing for a second, she went back to her own business.

Jude obediently curled up on the bay window, watching Clara out of the corner of his eye as she played on her phone, set her alarm, and fell asleep. He occasionally made small talk with her, and they bid each other goodnight. Once he saw that Clara’s breathing had steadied, he silently pulled up Julian’s photos and videos from the database to study them repeatedly.

At this moment, he had no clear or grand ambitions. He simply felt that since Clara had brought him into this world and designed him in Julian’s likeness, he had to be better than the original.