"The 33rd Contract of Love" Chapter 9
"That's impossible."
After saying it, I even startled myself; I hadn't expected I could be so decisive.
Julian was stunned, clearly not expecting me to refuse him.
Julian: "Is it because of me that you're unwilling to go back?"
I wanted to say yes, but I knew that saying so would mean I had lost—a total and complete defeat.
I answered in a different way: "I let go of everything three years ago. It’s just that life here is very comfortable, and I want to stay in this city."
Julian wanted to try persuading me further, but suddenly realized he had no standing to say anything to me.
He wasn't my biological brother, nor was he anyone to me.
"Childhood sweethearts"—the term sounded lovely, but there was no cage that could lock us together.
"I understand," Julian said.
He left without a hint of lingering.
I stood there watching him walk away, a sneer escaping my lips.
I looked up at the sky, holding back the tears in the corners of my eyes. "Just as I thought."
In three years, nothing about him had changed; only I remained locked in the corner of love, festering away.
...
Having walked far away, Julian pulled out his phone and dialed a number. "Jude, I found her."
Chapter 17
I walked out of the psychological clinic, carrying two bags of new medicine.
The doctor was concerned that seeing someone from my past might cause a relapse, so the dosage was increased.
Though I’ve never liked taking medicine, I hesitated at the mention of a "relapse" and accepted the changes to my prescription.
I still remember when I first arrived in this city; because I hadn't seen Julian for so long, I was so haggard that I looked like a demon crawling out of hell.
The doctor almost committed me to a psychiatric hospital, but fortunately, I managed to pull through.
"Speaking of which, the coffee beans should have arrived today." I tucked the medicine boxes into my bag and hurried back to the shop.
Julian was already there.
When I walked in, I didn't notice that there was someone sitting across from him.
"Yu, today's coffee..."
Yu’s eyes flickered, glancing behind me.
I froze, not quite understanding what she meant.
"Sienna."
A familiar voice sounded, and my body went rigid.
After a moment, the person continued, "Do you not even want to see your own brother?"
I finally snapped out of it and turned to see a man with stubble on his face. My eyes reddened, and I called out hoarsely, "Jude."
Jude suddenly raised his hand, the force of it bringing a gust of wind. Startled, I closed my eyes.
For a long time, the slap never fell.
I tentatively opened my eyes, only to find myself pulled into my brother’s embrace.
"Do you have any idea how worried Mom and Dad were?" Jude whispered.
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"I’m sorry."
After apologizing, I looked up and saw Julian standing there, watching us.
Julian watched in silence, suddenly realizing that a real sibling bond was completely different from what he had imagined.
At the very least, his first instinct wasn't to scold or worry, but rather the joy of finding something lost.
Furthermore, he wouldn't have hugged her so directly.
Julian lowered his gaze slightly, beginning to think deeply about what had been on his mind when he first saw Sienna again.
Under the lights, Sienna was surrounded by a faint glow, looking just as she had in his countless dreams, but clearer and more real.
Her brows, her cheeks, the corners of her lips...
Julian’s eyes were filled with panic and confusion; he instinctively suppressed the thoughts in his heart.
"Julian," Jude called out, turning around.
Startled, Julian looked at the siblings.
They were still standing close together, yet maintained the proper distance between a man and a woman.
Jude said, "Sienna, take the day off. I’ll treat you to a meal."
I wanted to refuse, but I didn't want to disappoint my brother. I looked at Yu as if for help.
Yu brought over a cup of coffee and said, "Sienna, here is your daily cup. Once you drink this, you’ll be fine. I can handle things alone today."
That was right; I came here to use the scent of coffee to suppress my paranoia.
I finished the coffee, and the unease in my heart instantly vanished. I felt like I could handle it.
It was just a meal, and besides, my brother was there.
During the meal, Jude asked about my life in the city.
I answered composedly, skipping over the torture in the clinic during those first two years. Every answer seemed perfect.
This was how it should be—this was a normal person's life, and it was the expectation of my brother and parents.
And even more... it was the version of me that Julian expected.
"Are you truly having no problems at all living here by yourself?" Julian suddenly asked.
The smile remained on my face, but it didn't reach my eyes.
"Of course there are no problems. I told Julian before that the next time we met, he would see a different Sienna," I said calmly. "I’m not inferior to you two anymore."
Julian and Jude fell silent at the same time, staring at me with complex expressions.
The atmosphere at the table suddenly shifted.
"What’s wrong?" I asked in confusion.
Jude hesitated before saying, "You never used to call..." He glanced at Julian. "...call him that."
It dawned on me, and I gave a light laugh. "I was immature back then. Didn't I also call you by your full name for a while, Jude?"
"That’s because..."
That was because they were biological siblings; both happened to be in their rebellious phase, so they called each other by their full names.
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Jude was about to say more, but Julian stopped him.
The lunch ended in silence.
As I stood up, I accidentally knocked my bag, and a bag full of medicine boxes scattered all over the floor.
The other two froze where they stood.
Chapter 18
The medicine boxes hit the ground with a soft thud, like a drumbeat striking the hearts of the two men.
I quickly crouched down, frantically stuffing them back into my bag.
Jude immediately realized something. He grabbed my hand and cried out in shock, "Sienna, are these—!"
I violently pushed Jude away. In my panic, I saw the look of disbelief and shock on Julian’s face.
"It’s just ordinary cold medicine," I explained feebly.
"Sienna! Now is not the time for jokes!"
Julian furrowed his brows and said seriously, "Sienna, this is a very important matter. You must tell us the situation. No matter what, we will stay with you and help you get treatment..."
Those words were like a spark hitting gunpowder; they exploded directly in my head.
"I said it’s just ordinary medicine!" I interrupted Julian, a hint of urgency in my tone. "I haven't had a relapse in a long time!"
I wasn't an outlier, nor was I mentally ill; I was just a little persistent, a little mischievous.
I never wanted to hurt Julian.
Julian looked dazed; he realized the reason I had gone to get medicine today.
"Was it because you saw me that you went to the hospital?"
Jude was startled. He saw the despair of someone whose secret had been exposed on my face. His gaze shifted between the two of us; finally, he opened the door and walked out, giving us space.
I wanted to take that opportunity to flee, but Julian grabbed my arm.
With a thud, Julian pressed his hand against the door, pinning me between himself and the wooden panel.
He looked down at me, his dark eyes behind the silver-rimmed glasses staring intently, as suppressed emotions slowly seeped out.
"Answer me," Julian said in a low voice.
"No." I kept my head down, not daring to meet his gaze.
I was afraid of being seen through again; if that happened, I would fall back into the endless abyss.
I couldn't go back to the past.
I had clearly started a new life—why did they have to come back and disturb me?
Why wouldn't Julian just let me go?!
Hearing that answer, Julian tightened his fist in displeasure.
The person under his arm was different from the one under the streetlight that night; right now, I was shrouded in darkness, my shoulders trembling as if I were crying.
Absurd thoughts once again filled Julian’s mind.
He never knew he would have a day where he lost his composure.
In his countless fantasies of finding Sienna, he thought he might joke with her that the game of hide-and-seek was over, or perhaps calmly notify Jude and then the two of them would together force her to come home...
Many possibilities, but never this one.
Three years of longing had fundamentally changed the nature of his feelings, even if they weren't romantic love.
"Julian, move aside," I commanded softly.
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