"Nine Hundred Flights to Goodbye" Chapter 9
She still resented him; she still hated him.
This realization felt like having his internal organs soaked in vinegar—bitter and stifling.
He shouted all his emotions out to her: "Jolene, I regret it."
"I did too many things wrong. I didn't cherish you properly. I’m sorry."
"I didn't cheat. Jolene, the question you asked me repeatedly—I can give you a clear answer now. I only love you. You are the only one in my heart. My life belongs only to you."
"As for Chloe, I was blind. I’ve cut ties with her completely. I swear, such a situation will never happen again."
Xavier acknowledged to himself that he had never been this humble in his life.
He had been a favored child of destiny since birth, building a private hospital from the ground up with his superior medical skills. He had never known failure in his life.
The only time he had ever stumbled so catastrophically was on the path of love. He dreamed of returning to the past so he could love Jolene even more.
"Jolene, I love you. I really, really love you. Please forgive me and come back with me, okay?"
Seeing Xavier again, Jolene remained unnervingly calm.
She had long prepared herself for the possibility that he would find her. The reason she chose this institution was precisely because it was far beyond the reach of his influence. Here, they stood on equal ground.
"Back where?" Jolene spoke coldly. "You and I haven't had a home for a long time."
"The moment you kept me in the dark while continuing your ambiguity with Chloe, the moment she had the password to come and go as she pleased, and the moment the servants all began following her orders—it became impossible for us."
Jolene lowered her gaze; since she had decided to break it off, she wouldn't allow any lingering attachments. Ignoring the faint glint of tears in Xavier’s eyes, she turned and asked the security guards to escort him out.
"Xavier, I don't want to repeat the same words twice."
"We are finished."
"Please stay away from me. You make me feel sick."
Xavier forgot how he was eventually kicked out by security. There was no embarrassment or anger, only a profound sense of disbelief. Jolene had never spoken such final words to him. In his presence, she had always been soft and forgiving.
He was the one who had lost her.
But he was unwilling to give up. Jolene was the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He would do anything for her, as long as she forgave him.
So, Xavier waited for a long, long time. As the sun began to set, Jolene finally emerged from the conference hall. She was surrounded by several smiling classmates who were praising her in English, saying her startup project had raised funds far beyond their imagination.
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Jolene simply shook her head humbly. "It was a team effort."
In the distance, Xavier stood beneath the shade of a tree, the corners of his mouth lifting. This was the Jolene he loved.
After the students dispersed, Xavier originally intended to step forward and grab her. But after a moment's hesitation, he decided to follow her back to her residence. He wanted to know where she lived so he could better pursue her.
He followed her all the way to her rented apartment. Seeing her pull out her keys, he couldn't help but rush forward and embrace her tightly from behind. He took a deep breath of her scent, feeling his tense nerves finally relax as he murmured, "...Wife, I missed you so much."
This long-lost term of endearment made Jolene’s stomach churn. She shoved him away forcefully. "Xavier, are you deaf? I said we are finished!"
"It’s not over!" Xavier gasped, trembling.
He realized Jolene knew exactly how to hurt him the most—by repeatedly severing their connection, like countless needles piercing into his very marrow.
"Wife, we’ve been together for nearly ten years..." Xavier said with a sob. "Are you really going to sentence me to death over one small mistake?"
"I can't live without you. I’ve long grown used to days with you by my side. You have no idea how much I’ve suffered during these few days apart..."
"I can't see you; I can't sleep through the night. I miss you to the point of madness. I drank myself into a stupor just so I could see you in my dreams. Even if it was a lie, I cherished it..."
"Look at these wounds—this is the price I paid to find you." It was midwinter abroad, with light snow falling, yet Xavier ignored it and tore open his clothes. He revealed the bandaged gauze beneath, where the wounds had burst open again from his travels, seeping blood.
"Jolene, three stabs. It hurts, but it isn't even one-ten-thousandth of the pain I felt losing you..."
"Have you forgotten how much I love you? When you were abroad, I worked overtime like a madman just to fly overnight to see you. I bought every piece of jewelry without blinking and sent them across the ocean to your hands..."
"So what?" Jolene interrupted him.
Of course she hadn't forgotten, but it was precisely these memories she once thought were precious that had turned into sharp nails, pinning her down until she bled a river when he betrayed her. Since Xavier was thick-skinned enough to talk about the past, she didn't mind settling the score line by line.
She owed him nothing.
Jolene let out a mocking laugh. "Xavier, I think you’re the one who forgot. You said in that lounge that going abroad was exhausting, that sending gifts was a chore, and that your love for me was disappearing..."
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"Is this fun? Acting one way to my face and another behind my back? Xavier, you are terrifyingly hypocritical."
Xavier felt as if he had been struck by lightning. His blood froze instantly, and even his fingertips went stiff. "...You heard that?!"
Didn't that mean that when he embraced Chloe outside the lounge, Jolene had witnessed that as well?
No wonder... he had been complaining that the first thing Jolene did upon returning was interrogate him about his relationship with Chloe. It turned out the root of every error began with him!
Xavier’s fingers turned white until they felt numb, and his voice was incredibly hoarse. "That night was an accident."
Chloe had received news that her internship had passed; she was so excited that she hugged him! Xavier wanted to explain, to say he was forced into it.
But Jolene didn't want to hear it anymore. She took a step back. "Xavier, not loving someone means just that. If you knew me, you’d know I mean what I say."
"Your stalking behavior is shameless. End it here. Don't make me hate you."
With that, Jolene turned and entered the complex, leaving Xavier standing there with his fists clenched. After a long time, he slowly uttered each word: "But, I can't do it."
The more he learned of the cruel truth, the more regretful and guilty he became. He couldn't imagine how much grievance Jolene had endured in places he didn't know. Because of this, he could not give up on her; he had to pay her back twofold.
Over the next few days, Xavier followed Jolene silently.
At six in the morning, when Jolene went to school for classes, he followed her to the classroom and brought her a container of millet porridge he had cooked himself. Fingers accustomed to holding a surgical scalpel had never been in a kitchen before. Lacking focus from days of no sleep, he accidentally knocked over the scalping porridge in the morning, drenching himself. Red blisters rose on his exposed skin.
But Jolene only gave him a sideways glance before throwing his breakfast onto the ground. Treating him like a total stranger, she went straight to her lecture.
At noon, as Jolene and her team pushed forward with their startup plan, Xavier had his assistant exhaust every connection to find resources that could help her, delivering them to the conference room personally. But the moment Jolene saw it was him, she slammed the door.
In the evening, Xavier tried every way to send her gifts. Sometimes it was a one-of-a-kind necklace he had flown to another city specifically to outbid everyone for. Sometimes it was 999 vibrant roses flown in, symbolizing a beautiful love.
But no matter what it was, Jolene threw them into the trash without a moment's hesitation.
After several days of no progress, Xavier admitted he was becoming frustrated by the rejections, yet he reflected on whether his gifts simply hadn't touched her heart. Consequently, he disappeared for two days. When he reappeared at the bottom of her building, he held a photo album made with sincere effort.
He had gone back home and gathered photos of them together over all those years. From their youthful, naive days to their thirties, the man and woman stood side-by-side with similar smiles. Every photo was filled with sweetness and happiness.
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