Chapter 100: Need to be Alive...

Qingyin had known of Zora's return for a long time.

Qingding was currently in seclusion; otherwise, she surely would have taken Qingyin to see their old acquaintance.

However, Qingyin paced back and forth before the Buddha statue, her brows knit and eyes focused. A long time passed—so long that months went by—and she still hadn't taken that step.

It wasn't until Zora's reputation grew even more prominent, spreading throughout the cultivation world, that Qingyin took a deep breath. She tidied her clothes until they were perfectly clean and, after some thought, put on a relatively simple, plain garment.

It was her benefactor who had rescued her from the brothel; she wanted to tell her that the Chunling of back then had been worth saving.

Years ago, Turi Qi had granted Zora's request and pointed out a clear path for her. Qingyin was deeply grateful and had interacted with Turi Qi several times over the decades. It was also Turi Qi who first informed her of Zora's return.

Qingyin arrived at the December Sect.

"Senior Sister Zora?" a disciple said. "She isn't in the sect. It seems she went to repel some demonic monsters."

Qingyin missed her. Her nervous tension snapped and she let out a sigh of relief. After asking for the location, she hurried toward the mortal lands at the foot of the mountain.

The few commoners there had already been evacuated, leaving the place empty. It was mostly mountains and forests. When Qingyin arrived, she only saw numerous cultivators crowding and pushing, blocking the road.

Just as Qingyin was about to ask a cultivator dressed as an array master, that cultivator suddenly acted as if injected with chicken blood, crying out in alarm:

"She's here, she's here, she's here!"

Everyone held their breath and looked up in unison; Qingyin couldn't help but follow their gaze.

It was a flash of sword light that illuminated her face and her slightly widening pupils.

She had once seen a strike from the Sword Sovereign, Wanghua-jun, and felt only awe—the tremor of a weakling seeing the strong.

Now, however, there was a trace of an inexplicable emotion.

It made one focus more on the sword Qi itself rather than its power.

Because that sword Qi was clear and bright, cleansing the mind and attracting countless eyes, as if everyone had become phototactic.

Even without repelling enemies, its mere existence was enough to shock the heart.

There were no overly gaudy colors, nor was there the icy killing intent of Wanghua-jun. The monsters were shredded by the sword wind and then vanished within the sword light.

Such a brutal scene appeared in the light as if a mere insect had died; no one paid it any mind.

When the light faded, the person's shadow was finally revealed.

She stood atop an array in mid-air. The complex patterns beneath her feet glowed with a yellow hue. Her expression was indifferent, her features leaning toward a harmless look, yet she had just slain the monsters that had caused the other cultivators such headaches.

It was perfectly quiet.

Only the rustling of the forest remained.

Qingyin watched blankly. Having witnessed that sword Qi, she realized with a shock how far Zora had grown.

She still wanted to speak with Zora.

In her daze, her body moved forward involuntarily, making her stand out among the stunned crowd.

She stood out enough that the person waiting for the sword cultivator below finally moved.

Holding a long spear in his arms, the youth who had been staring up at Zora instantly flicked his gaze down, precisely locating the "anomaly."

Eyes as dark as night swept over Qingyin. Vane recalled for a moment and recognized her as the person Zora had saved years ago.

His gaze was extremely cold and not hidden intentionally. Qingyin quickly snapped out of it, realizing that

he

was still following her benefactor.

The youth had grown taller and more mature, yet he still carried a sense of high spirits that separated him from other mature cultivators.

His pupils were pitch black without a trace of any other color; his eyes were so distinct in their black and white that the dark pupils seemed even denser and heavier.

Qingyin shivered.

After years of not meeting, the presence of this attendant had grown even more formidable.

Zora watched the spot where the monsters had vanished. She stayed on the array for a moment, then turned around. A large crowd was looking up at her. When the girl looked down, most people instinctively lowered their heads, not daring to look directly.

Zora had no interest in why so many people were crowding here. She scanned the area.

She sheathed her sword and took her leave. Only then did Vane turn to follow her.

Famous people are watched regardless of what they do.

Especially when slaying important and powerful monsters; the moment Zora accepted the mission, it spread to the ears of those who loved gossip.

In storybooks, two peerless swordsmen agree to a duel to the death, and the masses flock to witness it.

In reality, a famous sword cultivator naturally receives the same attention.

I didn't find a chance to talk,

Qingyin thought.

I'll go again next time.

She chanted sutras all night and rushed to the December Sect just as dawn broke the next day.

For some reason, the array outside the Falling Rock Forest did not stop her. Qingyin happened to run into Zora just as she was getting out of bed.

This was a strange cultivator.

She clearly pursued power, yet she still followed her original lifestyle—eating and sleeping. She wasn't like other ambitious people who wished they could split one day into three.

When Qingyin first entered the Chanding Temple, she had seen people like this.

They were neither hurried nor slow, their mindsets exceptionally stable. They simply followed their plans strictly and step-by-step; in the end, they were able to reach very high levels of cultivation.

Perhaps it's efficient effort,

Qingyin thought.

Zora didn't recognize her. Opening the door, she saw a smooth, bald head. The other woman had a face like a clear lotus, her eyes shimmering as she looked at her. She seemed to have a thousand words but feared saying the wrong thing, resulting in a long, hesitant silence.

Zora remained expressionless, her heart as hard as iron: "..."

Zora: "Who."

Qingyin immediately answered: "I am the woman from the brothel you once saved, Chunling."

...Who?

Zora thought for a long while before digging a small shadow out of her memory.

"I am now... now called Qingyin. I am a Buddhist cultivator of the Chanding Temple."

Zora nodded.

"So, is there something?"

"No... nothing..." Qingyin murmured. Seeing Zora about to pass her and leave, she hurriedly said, "I just wanted to thank you personally, and I wanted to tell you—"

She took a deep breath, her brows knit: "I did not waste the rescue you gave me. I don't know what you lack, but I have a stalk of Imperial Immortal Grass here. It is of great benefit to cultivation."

Qingyin handed her a wooden box.

Zora didn't take it. She looked down at it and asked instead: "Is this to repay a debt?"

Qingyin was stunned: "...Yes, it is to repay a debt."

"Use it yourself. External items are of little use to me now."

Currently, only her sword needed external items for enhancement. If she used any miraculous pills or herbs herself, they might have a small effect, but ultimately not much.

Zora paused, then suddenly touched her chin and looked at her searchingly.

Qingyin was about to press the gift further but grew nervous under that gaze, unable to help but ask: "What's wrong?"

Zora said: "If you want to repay the debt, then let me pat your head."

"Ah... what?"

Qingyin lowered her head in a daze. Zora's hand was very cold, like soft ice patting her head again and again.

Zora satisfied her curiosity and withdrew her hand, about to leave.

Qingyin: "Where are you going?"

"Mhm..." Zora opened the mission letter in her arms. "Xizhou. A mission assigned by the sect."

She walked toward the stone forest, her silhouette gradually shrinking.

Qingyin's heart suddenly jolted. She bowed her head and touched her chest, but found nothing wrong.

It made her unable to stop herself from calling out: "Benefactor, aren't you going to wait for... Fellow Daoist Vane?"

Zora turned back, puzzled: "I don't need him for the mission. It's a temporary task. Besides, if he comes now,

he

would need to wait for

me

."

A master, of course, does not coordinate with a servant's time.

In Zora's view, it was just a solo mission. She thought for a moment and sent a letter to Vane, telling him to make dinner that evening so she could eat when she returned.

True...

Qingyin didn't speak again. She wanted to find something to say but didn't know what, so she could only watch her leave.

On this sunny day, Qingyin still remembered her silhouette—the fluttering ribbons in her twin buns, the blue and white hem of her clothes, and her taking flight on her sword, vanishing from sight.

There was a slight, inexplicable sense of loss, though she didn't know its meaning.

Qingyin stayed in place for a while. There was a rustling sound in a nearby tree.

Looking up, there was a flash of bright white, like a crescent moon. Robes swayed among the green leaves, and a drop of wine fell, wetting the fabric.

There were only two people in the Falling Rock Forest.

Qingyin gave a bow: "Thank you, Immortal Zhou."

She was referring to the fact that the array of the Falling Rock Forest had not hindered her.

Zhou Shijin did not answer. She turned over, her wine flask hanging from a branch; she seemed to be asleep.

If Zora hadn't received a temporary mission, she probably would have been sleeping like Zhou Shijin. Neither of the two in the Falling Rock Forest needed sleep, yet both were accustomed to it.

Qingyin returned to the Chanding Temple. Her senior sister, Qinging, was bare-armed and forging iron, making loud, crackling noises.

Qingyin watched for a long time but couldn't see what she was making; it seemed she was striking the air. "...Senior Sister, what are you forging?"

"Oh, Qingyin. Didn't you remind me?" Qingding wiped the sweat from her forehead and smiled gently. "I also consider myself an acquaintance of Fellow Daoist Zora; we've met a few times. Since she has triumphed over danger this time, I thought I would send her something."

Only then did Qingyin see the tiny object.

It was a writing brush. Although she didn't know why a brush was being forged with iron-working methods, it was definitely a brush.

Qingding: "To give a gift, you must give what the person lacks. I heard Fellow Daoist Zora is eager to learn and loves reading, so I'll give her a brush."

Qingyin: "..."

She pocketed the treasure Zora had rejected and left gloomily.

Xizhou.

It was dry and hot. There were very few people on the street. The occasional few walked quickly, covered in sweat, avoiding the blazing sun.

As soon as Zora landed, she ran into an acquaintance.

Turi Qi took back her gourd, surprised: "Junior Sister Zora? Why are you here?"

"There are monsters here. The sect assigned a mission," Zora answered, opening the letter and showing it to her again.

"I see. I'm heading home for a visit."

After mentioning their respective destinations, they should have gone their separate ways. Turi Qi did exactly that. She turned and took a few steps, then looked back.

Under the blazing sun, the girl was motionless, just watching her.

Turi Qi instinctively gave her a smile. "...Junior Sister Zora, aren't you going to the mission site?"

Zora looked into Turi Qi’s clear, gentle eyes and suddenly said: "Do you still like that Wanghua-jun?"

Turi Qi was stunned, seemingly not expecting her to be so blunt: "...What?"

Zora thought she hadn't heard clearly, so she took a few steps closer and stood before her, repeating: "Do you still like that Wanghua-jun?"

"..."

Turi Qi thought this hopeless crush was known only to her. If someone like Vane, who could perceive hearts, or Yiling Ke had discovered it, she wouldn't have been surprised.

But it was Zora.

Turi Qi didn't react for a moment, only saying with slight surprise: "...How did Junior Sister Zora know?"

She couldn't say she read it in the original work, so Zora said matter-of-factly: "I saw it for myself."

It wasn't a lie—she

had

seen it for herself, just in a book.

"..."

Turi Qi had a look of disbelief. She paused, but didn't say anything further. Instead, she asked: "Did something happen?"

"No," Zora said honestly. " I just dislike him a bit, and I'm curious what about him is worth liking."

Coming from anyone else, these words would sound mocking or cynical, but Zora was very sincere. She looked at Turi Qi with eyes full of a desire for knowledge, like a customer waiting for a sales pitch.

"I see..." Turi Qi didn't ask the reason for the dislike; she knew her junior sister's temperament well. Her brow relaxed, and she looked down at the ground. After a moment, a light smile touched her lips as she frankly analyzed her younger self.

"In the past, Master was the strongest sword cultivator in the world, praised by everyone. He indeed ignored worldly affairs and was indifferent to fame and wealth. He was also the first to step forward and take me as a disciple."

Back then, she had just lost her wet nurse. A seven-year-old child facing a titan like a cultivation sect would only be crushed by the pressure, not daring to make any requests, only watching others' faces.

So at that time, the only adult who approached her became like a life-saving straw. She could only rely on him, on this great tree.

If she had grown up like that, they might have become a master and disciple like father and daughter. But Wanghua-jun’s appearance never changed; he always looked like a young man. It wasn't until Turi Qi grew into a teenage girl that she vaguely realized she was too close to her Master.

Was it because he rarely entered the world and ignored social graces that his sense of boundaries was so unclear?

Or did he still view her as a child and think being close didn't matter?

Falling in love was a logical progression. She fell into the trap alone, even worrying that this forbidden love would trouble him.

It did trouble him. He had once rejected her, but then approached her again as if regretting it once Turi Qi gave up, yet he remained silent.

It was only after she was rejected and met Zora that she saw his many flaws clearly.

Not saving her friend—that wasn't his duty; she understood.

Speculating about her friend and looking down on her sect affairs—that, she could not accept.

"As for now... there's nothing much to 'like' anymore. I respect Master as I would respect a father," Turi Qi laughed.

"But thinking back, before Junior Sister Zora arrived, I always revolved around sect affairs and Master. It seemed there was nothing else. Perhaps relying on Master back then was inevitable."

Her world had been too monotonous—only the sect and her Master. If the sect affairs didn't have her, they could actually still function. Thus, Wanghua-jun appeared so special in her world.

Zora was an opening, pulling her from that monotony into the real cultivation world to find her own place.

Now, many people scrambled to team up with Turi Qi for missions. After all, ever since Senior Sister Turi began cultivating, her ability to strengthen teammates had grown by the day—she was a tool that could turn defeat into victory.

Sometimes, saving someone doesn't require working oneself to death, being fully devoted, and helping with everything. She wasn't an independent waste; everything still relied on herself.

It only takes an opening, even a single team-up or a single sentence. Someone who truly wants to move upward will naturally walk through it. They simply lacked the chance to see the world outside.

Zora listened as if to a story, seemingly not expecting herself to be involved. She gave an "ah."

"Then I helped you."

Turi Qi chuckled: "Yes. Thank you, Junior Sister Zora."

"You're welcome."

The two parted.

Zora stated to the System: "She doesn't like that male lead anymore."

[...]

The Oracle had known this result for a long time. Although others had saved angst-novel heroines before, they always revolved around the leads—either giving the heroine resources, working hard for her, or giving her a therapy session. It was mainly about devotion. And it always involved focusing intently on the heroine. Where could one find someone like the Host, who just drifted past lightly?

[Ahem,] the System cleared its throat. [It's okay, Host. None of that is our business. Our priority is the task. Once the task is done, we don't have to care about anything!]

Zora asked, puzzled: "I didn't say it mattered."

She paused and continued: "I'm also a bit happy."

[Why?]

Zora: "Because I dislike the male lead. Senior Sister Turi is my friend. Whether she is with him or not doesn't matter to me—that's her own business. But if she isn't with him, I'll be happy."

[...] The System fell silent.

Not because of what the Host said, but because the Host had actually successfully analyzed her own mindset.

The System's mood was complex, carrying the melancholy of seeing a child grow up a bit: [...That's great.]

"?"

"So what happens if the female lead isn't with the male lead?"

[The male lead loses his status as the male lead,] the System said nonchalantly. [After all, this is a female-oriented novel. Even if it's a 'bad ending,' even if it's an angst novel, even if the female lead is dead at the finale, it's a novel from the female lead's perspective.]

[But don't worry. Since the Host has entered the novel world, this novel has become its own small world. The female lead will be surrounded by fortune; the male lead... not necessarily. After the finale, everyone's fate depends on themselves. What happens to the female lead depends on her.]

The System spoke with finality: [Anyway, after the finale, the Host doesn't need to worry about protagonist or supporting character halos causing trouble.]

Zora didn't speak again. She reached the mission site.

A mountain peak before her sensed the sword cultivator's arrival. It thundered and shook, actually transforming into the shape of a monster, shaking the earth.

Before the massive entity, a single human silhouette was far too small, like a mayfly trying to shake a tree. Yet she wasn't flustered at all, nor did she fly up to face it eye-to-eye.

Holding the River Snow sword, the bright blade reflected her eyes like cold stars. Spiritual power surged in, covering the blade with a layer of soft, white light.

The monster seemed to sense the threat. It crouched low and opened a mouth as large as a small hill.

...

"Well? Is she back?"

Tu Zhu spoke, his voice lowered intentionally.

Li Xin glanced at the door: "Don't worry, Master. It should be soon."

"Good, good."

Inside the Tu residence, it was silent.

Tu Zhu was quiet for a moment, then bowed submissively to ask the person behind the screen in a low voice: "Immortal, she should be back any moment."

Behind the screen, a man's voice responded slowly: "Mhm."

Tu Zhu bowed again. Li Xin hadn't entered the room; she stood at the door, her expression wary as she stole a glance at the screen, then immediately withdrew her gaze when Tu Zhu straightened up.

That was a Nascent Soul cultivator Tu Zhu had hired at a great price, nearly emptying the family coffers.

He didn't belong to any sect; he was a rogue cultivator.

Tu Zhu exited the room, ignoring his wife, and walked straight to the guest hall. Li Xin remained expressionless, took one last look at the room where the cultivator was, and then followed Tu Zhu with light steps.

What they wanted was Turi Qi’s Sword Bone.

Specifically, it was what Tu Zhu wanted.

He had profoundly sensed his own aging; his body was growing weak.

This man, who had been arrogant and incompetent from childhood, couldn't accept that he wouldn't achieve eternal life—especially when contrasted with Turi Qi.

Back in the Tu family, Turi Qi was the unloved daughter, greatly neglected. Her mother still harbored deep illusions about her father, often telling her daughter that the head of the house was just too busy and that he still loved them.

After that woman died, the wet nurse also comforted her, saying the head of the house loved her.

Only Tu Zhu sneered at this elder sister. He didn't deign to give her a glance; he even found her room too messy and dilapidated to bully her in, lest he dirty his feet.

She should have always been beneath his feet, always living worse than him—ideally begging him and trying her hardest to please him while he sat on high, bestowing mercy according to his mood, not even having the desire to step on this ant.

It should have been like that! It

should

have! That's how it was since birth; everyone said so!

The Heavens surely gave the spiritual roots and Sword Bone to the wrong person. It was fine; he would take them back.

Li Xin stole a glance at him, sitting in the guest hall with her eyes lowered.

This Nascent Soul cultivator was not someone they should have been able to hire. Even with the entire family's resources, it shouldn't have been possible.

Yet for some reason, that rogue cultivator had agreed. Tu Zhu was overjoyed. He didn't care about the reason for the agreement and hurriedly invited the man into the residence.

They would wait for Turi Qi to enter, then cut open her bone and embed that Sword Bone into his body.

A rumor prevalent in the mortal world:

Sword Bones can be transferred, meridians can be remolded, and spiritual roots can be created.

Otherwise, why wouldn't those people test for Sword Bones? Why wouldn't they publicize those with Sword Bones? It must be because they fear others' greed!

Tu Zhu could almost see the image of the Sword Bone being transferred to him and him regaining his youth. His wrinkled face trembled with excitement.

Li Xin remained silent, lowering her lashes, her posture dignified and straight.

Suddenly, a servant walked in: "Master, Miss Turi has arrived."

Tu Zhu stood up immediately, but the servant lowered his head as far as it would go in fear.

"A-and that Miss Zora."

"What?" Tu Zhu was surprised, then said sharply, "Who!?"

"It's... it's that Zora who murdered Young Master Tu..."

The guest hall fell silent for a moment. Only the servant's temples were sweating, and his folded hands shook slightly.

Li Xin urged softly: "Hurry and welcome them."

"Yes!" The servant acted as if he had received a reprieve and hurried out.

Li Xin turned toward the dark-faced man, leaning in softly and speaking in a low voice: "It's fine, Master. Didn't that Zora just enter the Nascent Soul stage? We'll have that Nascent Soul cultivator deal with her."

"What about Turi Qi?" His dark eyes glanced down, making Li Xin's heart jump.

She suppressed her deep fear and forced a smile: "Haven't we also set up many arrays? There are still several Foundation Establishment cultivators waiting in the back courtyard. They were obtained at a high price. Turi Qi’s cultivation isn't as high as Zora’s; we can certainly suppress her for a while."

She whispered: "...We've been preparing for decades. Master, rest assured."

Only then did Tu Zhu’s brow relax, and he reached out to pat the back of her hand resting on his arm.

Li Xin smiled and lowered her lashes again, hiding those watery eyes.

...

Zora had followed Turi Qi to the Tu residence after thinking about it for a moment once she finished killing the monster.

She had absolutely no awareness of having killed the family's son. In her eyes, he had tried to kill her, he was incompetent, and so he had been killed in return.

Zora also didn't care about the opinions of strangers. She just wanted to find Turi Qi to go eat together.

It was noon; it was time to eat.

Turi Qi reached the gate and saw Zora.

"Junior Sister Zora—?"

Zora asked: "Are we eating?"

Turi Qi turned to face her.

She originally intended to reject her tactfully because Zora had killed someone from the Tu family, letting Zora head back first.

Who knew the servant would rush in and then back out, saying hurriedly: "Master asks Miss Turi to go in. If Miss Zora is hungry, she can go to a room first and have some snacks."

What?

Turi Qi had lost any deep understanding of the Tu family members. They would put on an act before her. Even if they had made mistakes, in Turi Qi’s heart, they were family; hearing this, she was only surprised.

Zora nodded and followed the servant without a hint of hesitation.

Turi Qi took a step to follow her, but was stopped by another servant: "Master has something to say to Miss Turi as well."

The generational titles were a mess, but Turi Qi didn't care.

After all, Tu Zhu was old, and in the cultivation world, she was indeed considered young.

...

Turning left and right, Zora went deep into the courtyard. She suddenly stopped by a lotus pond.

Servant: "Miss Zora—?"

She looked toward the corridor.

There was a show of spiritual power leaking from that place.

The people of the Tu family really like to fight,

Zora thought.

Thinking this, Zora drew her sword. The servant immediately fled.

No one cared.

Two Nascent Soul cultivators stared at each other across the buildings. The air between them stagnated.

"You actually fell for it? You're really a Nascent Soul?" the man mocked. "Even stupider than a mortal."

Zora remained expressionless: "Are we fighting or not?"

The trap didn't matter. The person who ended up dead was the stupidest.

A strong spiritual power instantly erupted from the Tu residence. There were too many commoners around and too many restrictions; the two teleported to a deserted area far away in unison.

Even so, the commoners in the county still saw the trail of sword light and clouds left in the air.

Like a bright moon in the daytime, it was exceptionally beautiful.

December Sect.

Vane was about to head out in the morning when he received Zora’s letter.

He seemed to realize he couldn't stay with her today either. Before he even read the letter, the corners of his eyebrows dipped pitiably.

The handwriting was clear. It didn't have the air of a scholar, but it was pleasing to the eye. However, she had written in a hurry; many strokes were connected, requiring a moment to tell what the characters were.

Vane, however, read them without any obstacle.

Zora didn't say what she was doing, only her requirements.

"I want the spicy dish from last time for dinner, and roast chicken."

Mhm. She was commanding him. She needed him.

Vane’s pitiable air vanished instantly, and he was quite happy about having his feathers smoothed by her letter.

She usually wouldn't tell him when she went out. Naturally, a Master does not need to tell a servant when they leave.

But this time, she had specifically written a letter.

She rarely wrote. Having been apart for so long, he hadn't seen her handwriting for ages. The moment he unfolded the letter, he knew instantly that she had written it.

It had improved quite a bit and become much prettier. Zora must have practiced in the secret realm as well; she was truly hardworking.

Vane praised her in his heart, though his face remained unruffled. Staring fixedly with his dark eyes, he read the letter dozens of times before folding it and placing it inside his robe.

Besides the dishes Zora wanted, what else should he make?

Vane usually made several new dishes in addition to Zora’s requests—an automated service upgrade.

He remembered a few days ago when he had made extra dishes. Zora would first eat everything she liked, and then touch the remaining new dishes.

Those dishes were shrouded in his spiritual power; they wouldn't grow cold and were always at a suitable, warm temperature.

In the cultivation world, only he would use spiritual power to such an extent.

Without the aid of warm jade, relying entirely on spiritual power—this required extremely minute control, especially to maintain it for so long. It was certainly not simple.

"How is it?" Vane's tone was normal, but his eyes followed her movements.

Zora finished chewing and swallowed. "Not bad."

She ate every dish clean every time, not wasting a bit.

"That's good."

The corners of his lips curled up slightly as he watched the food. With his high ponytail hanging behind him, the youth's features appeared both clear and sharp under the light coming through the window.

Zora watched him. Her leg under the table moved slightly and bumped into Vane.

He thought it was an unintentional movement, so he only lowered his lashes and didn't move or say anything.

It wasn't until Zora bumped him with her leg several more times that he turned his head to look.

She always said whatever came to mind: "If I bring outside food next time, you sit here too and watch me eat."

Vane gave an affirmation. He was so brilliant, yet he felt the need to ask: "Why?"

Zora was exceptionally honest: "Because you're good-looking."

Vane paused, then spoke slowly, his voice both submissive and carrying a simple question: "Then do Senior Sister Turi and Yiling Ke need to join? They are also considered by everyone to have good appearances."

It seemed so. Zora only then began to think of the difference. She said: "You are different from them."

Vane didn't speak. He smiled on the surface, listening as usual, but his blood was as if flowing backward. It was like a dog had heard some wonderful praise; he was truly excited.

So excited that his skin felt as if stimulated, producing a dense, strange feeling.

Zora propped up her chin and bumped him with her leg a few more times.

"Got it?"

She was asking if he knew that even if he didn't cook next time, he had to watch her eat.

"..." Vane was half a beat slow. "I got it."

He got that he was receiving more of her gaze.

He got that she was so pitying of him, so pure, that she was willing to grant a servant her gaze and was gradually increasing it.

He had known this for a long time, but truly hearing those words, he felt like a sticky animal in a dark corner suddenly pulled into the sunlight—a strange feeling all over his body, making his hair stand on end in patches.

But in front of her, he acted perfectly normal.

He normally cleared the dishes, using a spell to wash them and put them away in an instant.

He normally watched her roll up in her quilt and close her eyes to sleep like an ordinary person.

He smiled and answered her as before: "I will call you in an hour."

And then, in the quiet room filled with her scent, his heart drummed alone, nearly melting into a pool of blood and mangled flesh.

That was why he needed to be alive.

Fearing that a prolonged gaze would disturb Zora, the youth sat at the table, yet he didn't turn a single page of the book in his hand.

...That was why he

must

be alive.

Only by being alive could he see her; only by being alive could he be used by her.

If he died, what would happen if he couldn't see her anymore?

If he died, what would happen if she wasn't as comfortable as she was now?

Vane understood that Zora was turning her gaze toward him, and she was gradually becoming more aware of his existence.

So he especially could not die.

He hoped that in her naivety, the first thing she felt would be pleasure.

Not a hazy, life-and-death reluctance to part.