"The Vow of Shattered Snow" Chapter 14
Everything looked so familiar yet so strange, as if all warmth were drifting away from him. He stepped into the room and gently touched the tables and walls, memories completely drowning him.
Just a few months ago, before Eva had returned, everything had been dull but cozy. Even if his feelings for Gu Roujia hadn't been great, they hadn't been this chaotic—a mess where he couldn't find his way, with all sorts of troubles emerging.
He remembered how he used to have many social engagements back then and would always return here late at night.
His stomach cramped. Julian pressed against it and opened the fridge, but couldn't find any hangover soup. He called Mother Wang.
In the past, when he had many engagements, there was always hangover soup in the fridge.
"...Sir, that apartment was always cleaned by Madam... Miss Gu. Everything in the fridge was prepared by Miss Gu herself."
"It was her." He smiled bitterly. He had a weak stomach and disliked mass-produced hangover products; the soup she made suited his taste perfectly. He had thought Mother Wang took care of his daily life, never imagining Gu Roujia had prepared these things with her own hands.
With only a few days left until the wedding, he shook his head to throw away those thoughts. But memory is something that always follows emotional changes; the sadder he felt, the more he missed her, and the clearer and harder to fathom those memories became.
Julian withdrew his hand and stared at the ceiling, his gaze deep, as if he could see the end of his memories. There stood a girl—Eva.
But at the end, there was only the ceiling, and on that ceiling was the woman who had made porridge for him, with a gentle smile on her face. That smile shouldn't have appeared on Gu Roujia’s face, Julian thought.
But he couldn't control himself from thinking that way. Looking back, that person had been by his side, permeating every detail of his life.
Chapter 28: Disappeared
Julian was lost in memories of the years since he married Gu Roujia when a phone call pulled him back to reality. He took a deep breath, pushing all emotions and memories to the bottom of his heart, and regained his composure.
"Mr. Lin, I’ve found the charger for that old phone. Should I send it to you, or..." the assistant asked. Julian thought for a moment. Everything started here, so the fog surrounding it should be dispelled here. "Send it over. I’ll text you the address later."
"Understood, Mr. Lin." The assistant hung up. Julian sat on the sofa, feeling three parts anticipation, five parts nervousness, and two parts confusion.
He anticipated what the forum posts on the phone recorded; he was nervous about seeing what kind of person Gu Roujia really was, whether his guilt was truly deserved, or if he could stop feeling so guilty; and he was confused about what to do once he knew it all.
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Twenty minutes later, the assistant hurried over with the charger. Julian impatiently took it, crouched by the outlet, and turned on the phone to watch the content.
He found the posts Gu Roujia had made ten years ago and read them word for word.
【I’m in the same university as Julian, I’m so happy. I can be with him again. I wonder if he still remembers me? Surely he does.】
【Eva said she wanted to introduce her boyfriend to me, and the person who walked in was him. The words of blessing were at the tip of my tongue, but my heart felt bitter and painful.】
【I thought I couldn't accept it, but looking at his happy face, I wanted to protect it. This emotion will be a secret I keep to myself. You will be happy, won't you?】
Julian’s heart began to pound violently. These posts were completely different from the Gu Roujia he knew; she had never thought of interfering between him and Eva.
When the truth was revealed and his previous perceptions were the exact opposite, it was hard to accept. Julian suddenly slumped onto the floor, clutching his heart, and asked: Was I wrong?
Julian had always believed that Gu Roujia had used underhanded methods to force Eva away and then seized the opportunity to be with him and marry him. How could he, Julian, have liked such a calculated, gold-digging woman? Everyone knows how to act, but the facts were right in front of him.
Gu Roujia hadn't forced Eva away; she hadn't even had the slightest intention to. Instead, she had chosen to leave silently, letting Eva be with him.
Could a woman who sacrificed for her love be a gold-digging schemer?
Her constant admiration and gentleness, her tolerance and understanding, her care and worry—they weren't acting; they were sincere!
But...
Julian leaned against the wall, utterly lost, murmuring: "Did I misunderstand you? If it was really a misunderstanding, why didn't you explain it all this time?"
Julian’s heart was in chaos.
Did I misunderstand you? But you never explained. Julian thought of everything Gu Roujia had done for him, then thought of everything he had done. Guilt seemed to turn into a sickle, slowly, gradually slicing through his heart blade by blade. The pain was truly indescribable. What on earth had he done?
While Julian was mired in self-reproach and memories, he received another call from his assistant. Compared to his previous calm, the assistant clearly felt the lowness and oppression in Julian’s tone now.
"Mr. Lin, Miss Gu has disappeared from the hospital..." the assistant said in a low voice.
Julian said "Oh," then suddenly stood up: "What did you say?"
The assistant repeated: "Miss Gu has disappeared from the hospital."
"She was fine in the hospital; how could she disappear?" Julian roared. "Didn't I tell you to watch her? How could a grown woman just disappear from the hospital?"
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Julian hung up the phone and pushed the door open, his demeanor fierce, like oppressive dark clouds signaling an impending storm.
Chapter 29: She Has Cancer
Julian rushed to the hospital, running countless red lights along the way. His unexplained nervousness left him gasping for breath. He had to find Gu Roujia and get the truth!
The assistant was talking to a nurse. Julian’s face was dark, and he asked coldly: "Why did you let her leave? Don't you know her health is poor?"
The assistant wanted to speak, but was glared down by Julian the moment he opened his mouth. He shrank back; it was the first time he had seen Julian so angry.
The nurse apologized: "The discharge procedures were handled by the attending physician, and Miss Gu was recovering very well, so we didn't think much of it."
"Get that doctor here!" Julian roared. The records on that old phone and Gu Roujia’s consistent attitude made the answer obvious. He was wrong—wrong through and through. He had misjudged Gu Roujia all along.
As this thought crossed his mind, Julian’s heart twisted in agony. What have I done!
As the nurse went to find the doctor, another nurse came over with a report: "Mr. Gu, here is Miss Gu’s examination report, you... uh," seeing Julian’s dark expression, the nurse said slowly: "The tests show that Miss Gu has uterine cancer..."
Julian doubted his ears. His face was grim, and his "don't-bother-me" aura made even the nurse hesitate to approach him.
"What did you say?" Julian snatched the report from the nurse.
Julian looked at the report; he couldn't accept this fact. By then, the assistant had brought the doctor who handled the discharge. Julian forgot to ask where Gu Roujia was and just held the report, asking: "Uterine cancer... did you misdiagnose her?" He simply didn't want to believe it: "She aborted the child not long ago. Wouldn't the various tests done during pregnancy have detected uterine cancer?!"
The doctor said: "Pregnancy checks involve ultrasounds. A shadow this large would definitely have been visible." Seeing Julian on the verge of an outburst, the doctor added: "It’s not that the hospital didn't treat her. We’ve seen similar cases before. If a patient is pregnant and needs treatment, the child certainly cannot be kept. I suspect the patient chose to protect the child and gave up treatment. Mr. Gu, your wife must have loved you and the child very much."
This sentence felt like a volley of arrows piercing Julian’s heart, causing him such pain he couldn't breathe.
It was he who hadn't wanted the child—all of it because he didn't want the child!
And Gu Roujia—she chose to protect their child even at the cost of her life.
Julian held the report, the words "uterine cancer" seeming like a mockery. He stepped backward, step by step, feeling suffocated.
Julian felt the world spinning. "I don't believe it... you would do this..."
The assistant quickly steadied Julian, whose eyes were bloodshot: "Investigate! Check the prenatal examination reports from that time!"
"I want the complete, tidy prenatal records! I want to know her decision at that time!" Julian screamed. For so long, he had truly been wrong. Coldness, cruelty—these weren't enough to describe what he had done to Gu Roujia. He remembered the pitiful woman in the dilapidated hospital holding the rag doll; his heart felt like it was being fried in boiling oil. His soul felt seized, violently torn apart. Julian felt the whole world rotating, turning black, and mocking him ruthlessly.
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