20.

Adrian filled himself with hard liquor.

Everything blurred and doubled, until the overlapping shapes formed a face he hated with a bitterness he could almost taste.

Of course he hated Julian.

But what did he hate him for?

For helping drive his mother to her death?

Yes.

For a long time, that was what he'd believed.

His mother's death had been a stone on his chest, crushing the breath out of him.

Eventually, all that weight had become vicious words.

But he knew Julian had had nothing to do with it.

The guilty one was his father.

So what, exactly, did Adrian hate?

Images flashed through his head.

He hated how many people surrounded Julian.

Hated the way Julian smiled at other men. The way he fell into other people's arms.

Hated how easily Julian said he liked someone, as if the words weighed nothing, as if they couldn't possibly be trusted.

Hated that Julian couldn't belong to him alone.

The answer was right there.

Adrian laughed.

At himself.

It was so simple, and it had taken him until now to see it.

The word even rose in his head again.

He felt as if he'd lost the only person in the world he was still connected to.

Fuck it.

He wanted Julian.

Love him. Hate him. Either was fine.

If he had to, he'd learn Julian's old tricks himself.

He wanted them tangled up in each other for the rest of their lives.

21.

My rented room had been tiny to begin with.

Once Adrian was inside, there was barely space left to breathe.

He glanced around twice, taking in the shabby furniture.

Then he caught my face and leaned over me.

"Who was that man today?"

He wasn't being gentle.

It felt as if he was about to pull my jaw off.

I grabbed at his fingers.

"Stop acting fucking crazy!"

"I asked you who he was."

"It's none of your business."

"None of my business?"

He repeated it slowly.

Then he smiled.

"None of my business? Do you like him, Julian? Do you call him your brother too? Do you sneak kisses from him?"

He looked as if he'd lost his mind.

His voice got softer with every word, pain seeping through his reddened eyes.

I froze.

I stared at him, stupidly.

My brain exploded into a useless mess.

I couldn't think.

Adrian kept moving forward, forcing me back.

There weren't many steps to take in that room.

Within seconds, he'd pressed me against the wall.

"I bought our house back, Julian. We're lucky. It never sold all these years. Everything inside is still there. We can go back. Start over."

Something cold touched my wrist as he spoke.

A handcuff.

One end around my wrist. The other around Adrian's.

Fear jolted through me.

I shoved him away as hard as I could.

My voice shook, almost breaking into tears.

"What do you want from me? We agreed we were even—"

He cut me off, abruptly, almost viciously.

"I fucking want you!"

His eyes were red.

He said it again.

"I want you, Julian. I fucking want you."

22.

He stared at me, then suddenly used his sleeve to rub my cheek.

The place Theo had kissed that afternoon.

Apparently rubbing it wasn't enough.

He cupped the back of my neck and kissed me.

Caught off guard, I flinched and went still.

When Adrian finally stopped, he buried his face against my neck.

His tears were so hot they made me shiver.

I heard him say, his voice trembling, "I'm an idiot, Julian. If I'd understood sooner, would we have lost so much time?"

I understood what he meant.

My nose stung all at once.

The feelings I'd thought had died suddenly answered back.

Years of hurt finally found a way out.

"You fucking—"

"No. I've never blamed you. I've never blamed you for it."

Adrian denied it desperately.

He held my shoulders and made me look at him.

"What about you? Do you blame me? What you said all those years ago, about liking me. Is any of it still true?"

I swallowed against the ache in my throat.

Then I gritted my teeth.

"Blame you? I fucking hate you."

His face went white.

He couldn't get his words in order.

"I..."

I ignored him and kept going.

"What gave you the right to ruin me? I fed you. I gave you somewhere to live. All I wanted was a little of your attention. How could you leave me all alone?"

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Adrian said it again and again.

Tears fell, washing away the suspicions and resentments until there was nothing left to hide behind.

I pushed him away again.

Then I lifted my wrist.

"Take this off. You're drunk. I'm not talking about this with you tonight. Come back tomorrow."

The next morning, Adrian appeared at my door on time.

Or maybe he'd been afraid I'd run and hadn't left all night.

I'd pulled myself together.

I held out my hand.

"Hi. Let's start again. I'm Julian Ashford."

Adrian froze.

Then his face filled with joy.

"Hi. Adrian Mercer."

The forecast had been right.

The rain clouds that had hung over me for so long had finally blown away.

From today on, there would be so many more sun-filled days ahead.

The End.